Thread regarding Dell Inc. layoffs

ISG Engineering's Agile Development Process

Step 1: Someone in Sales says, “The customer needs this.”

Step 2: Engineering says, “That's not on the roadmap.”

Step 3: Salea says, “$2 Million dollars is riding on this feature.”

Step 4: Exec Management says, "Drop what you're doing and make it happen."

Step 5: Engineering creates a Jira ticket.

Step 6: Ticket remains untouched for 12 months.

Step 7: Customer escalates.

Step 8: Ticket becomes P0 Critical.

Step 9: Two engineers work on it for 3 days.

Step 10: Product is released.

Step 11: Everyone celebrates the “successful product launch.”

Step 12: Customer finds 14 new bugs and feature is 1/3rd complete.

Step 13: Repeat Steps 9 - 12.

Agile.


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| 3 views | | 6 replies (last 2 days ago) | Reply
Post ID: @OP+1m0xzm2z3

6 replies (most recent on top)

Everyone is too busy repeatedly migrating from one Jira instance to the next to do actual dev work.

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Post ID: @q6+1m0xzm2z3

LOL. That is, more or less, the progression.

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Post ID: @bx+1m0xzm2z3

Where's the re--rded "project manager" in this scenario. Saying useless circle back over and over? Wait no, perfecting their powerpoint

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Post ID: @bw+1m0xzm2z3

@bt presidents club mini statue award though/s

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Post ID: @bv+1m0xzm2z3

And this is the problem with sales people, they think $2M is a significant number

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Post ID: @bt+1m0xzm2z3

Don’t forget about 2 million meetings in between because our SVPs and ISG division president are just utterly incompetent. That’s how they fill their time.

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Post ID: @bj+1m0xzm2z3

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